Why, God?

When I lived in Wilmington, things were going pretty well. We all bump along in life, but some of the bumps make you sick and nauseous and ready to get off this ride of life. I loved Wilmington, I had friends, I loved my church, I was playing in worship band using my talents for God, I had a job, I had a bank account with a little money, I had plans. However, when you are a preachers kid things don't go as planned, EVER. We had to move away to Charlotte. You all know my testimony. I kept asking God why. I was pretty happy. Since I have lived in Charlotte, it's been a very hard journey, things haven't been easy or like they were in Wilmington. I've not worked much with the economy being the way it is, my bank account was closed, just various things along the way that make me say, "I wish I were still in Wilmington." But then I stop and think, and get out of the emotional moment and think about all the blessings God has given since living here in Charlotte. I think of all the wonderful friendships I have, I think of the wonderful churches I belong to, and the mission trips I've been able to go on. I think of my college experience and my instructors who have become such great mentors and friends in my life. I think of the life changing experience I had last semester specifically in my theatre class. Everything builds on each other. And while, no, Charlotte isn't Wilmington, it is part of my life story. I have grown so much in my walk with Jesus. I have been challenged with His word. God has taken me deeper, and how shown me the way of the cross through these heartaches and trials. Fenelon wrote that we should let the ups and downs of our spiritual lives come and go. If we were always down, we would become hard hearted and discouraged. However, there are seasons where God lets us catch our breath. It's all about dying to ourselves. When I get out of the way, and submit and yield to the will of God, I will still suffer, but I will know that God has me right where he wants me and will take care of me, and provide my every need. We tend to forget the faithfulness of God. He is faithful.
I would not be who I am today had I not been through what I have. We have to be broken people before God can fix us the way he wants us to look. But even more than that, we have to be willing to let him fix us; be fully surrendered.